I need to scream, shout and yell till my lungs dry out cause I’ve turned 22 yesterday. What’s so great with aging? No by being young always. By being abstract and self-centered. Well! Hello hi aye you might be knowing me as a creepy stalker, a distant dreamer and an adorer of unnoticed things.
Life is cheesy. Lick it.
Photo courtesy- Siddhi
Well coming to the topic of why I feel like screaming happiness cause I am 22. It’s because I have learnt to accept myself and my real feelings. Yes like a nomad I’m waivered who doesn’t think before speaking, who actually sent off her 22nd birthday invitation like an hour ago she was to become 22, just a day before.
The point is that in the past couple of months I have been undergoing a lot of self-made heartbreaks and what’s a story without struggle and storm. After reading “The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A Fuck”, I came to the realization point that I was giving a fuck about a lot of things, failures, rejections and yes ghosting.
Imagine you get to hold someone’s finger and you feel that you are getting to catch a hand but you’re scared. Scared of rejections, your foundation being shaken. People just come and leave like stranger things. Then the coping up mechanisms begin of accepting yourself, your loving family and their endless commitments towards you. Being 22 made me responsible and less emotional. I would not like to carry that emotional baggage anymore and be a lost ghost. It’s been a long time since I have lived for people, kept them above my priorities list, been in one sided closed affairs and been a masochist of pain.
Selected love list
Photo courtesy- Prithvi Cafe
Yes I am spontaneous. I don’t do what I think and literally go unplanned. Functioning as per society’s norms makes me feels that I am told to leave rice to reduce my belly fat, but I can’t and I don’t want to. My 22nd birthday celebrations was a kickass one. I invited my selected squad at 10.54 pm a day before my birthday just to tell them that there’s a party tomorrow. After being told by the Dr that I need to stop wearing heels cause it puts extra pressure on my fingers and drains me in pain, I yet go to the malls and buy 6 pairs of “comfortable broad heels”. I did enjoy the best slice of my life with my selected squad at Prithvi Café. The open mic sessions there uttered unspoken words of my soul, and as my lips pressed softly against the Penne Pasta, Cheese Garlic Bread, Cheese Chilly toast and as I could not complete my complimentary birthday cake my friend said,” don’t force yourself. You’ve been the sweetest and if you can’t eat the last slice, don’t force eat”.
Yet again I pressed the message section of my Instagram account to see if I had received a message request and the balloon blasted on my face. My first birthday without his wish was indeed the special 22nd one as the callertune comes Tere bina zindagi bhi lekin zindagi nahi for you were mine and the life was complete. Now that you aren’t there my life is yet complete.